Thursday, June 12, 2014

The Bug Story

So...I have to tell you the Bug Story.

As you may have guessed, I am an avid gardener.   I just love to nurture along all the little plants that I seed in and the seedlings, as well.   I bought a coleus to use in one of the big black urns on my front step.  However, I had intended to buy two so they would sort of match.  I forgot.  Sometimes, I just get distracted by all the choices at the local nurseries and forget what I was supposed to purchase.

Anyway, I was on eBrandon, in the classified section, when I noticed a local fellow was selling ones similiar to mine for only 50cents a plant or 3/$1.00 which sure beat the $3.00 I had paid for the other one.  Not one to pass on a good deal, I contacted the very nice fellow and later in the evening went over to pick up my new plants.  He had a lovely selection of various colours of coleus and the most amazing collection of hostas.  He gave me a tour of his beautiful and interesting backyard.  It was most impressive and very exciting to see what he had done with it.  As we chatted, he showed me one particular hosta that grew incredibly huge that he had in the front yard.  We talked about the local deer problem and other gardening issues while standing in his immaculate front yard. It was one of the loveliest front yards I had ever seen!

Unfortunately, as we talked the mosquitoes and bugs were starting to present themselves full-force!  I had the misfortune to swallow one and choked and sputtered clumsily, much to my embarrassment.  I finally was able to finish my conversation and head home.  I drove down the street, stopped at the stop sign and turned right onto the larger main road.  There was only a little traffic as it was getting later in the evening.  About a half a block after turning, I realized that something was crawling inside my throat around my epiglottis!   I started to cough and was soon gagging.  This very quickly turned to me starting to feel like puking!  I put my hand in front of my face just as I started to throw up.  As I held the vomit in my hand against my face, I was trying to slow down and pull off the road.  I finally stopped and shut off the van, all the while gagging and continuing to try not to throw up more or drop what was in my hand.  I realized that I couldn't open the door with my left hand and had to struggle to open it with my right-all while still choking back vomit.  I finally got it open and still couldn't get out!  I had my seatbelt to still contend with!  Groan.  By now, I am in full heaving and vomit is starting to come up.  I finally stepped out of my van just as everything decided to spew from me.  I got the door of my van, I got my clothes, and the road all full force! 

After my very ungraceful exit and performance outside the van, I cleaned up the best I could and headed home.  After re-cleaning the van, I walked into the house.  My hubby took one look at my vomit covered outfit and face and asked what happened! I laughed, explained it to him and told him that "The upside is that I got rid of that bug!"